Sunday, July 31, 2011

Long Road Back Home - Short Story By: Ron Brown


Winds sweeping across the dust filled yard which meant to be planted with seed but never was. Billowing clouds dance in the air with a dance flowing till released gently to the ground. Lone broad-shouldered Chase sits tapping his foot to cause his rocking chair on the porch to rock in soothing waving pace with his mind contemplating how he came to this meager existence.

His faded jeans with tears in knees and hip not from fashion purchase but wear and lack of caring. His T-shirt faded from mixing it with his whites with bleach bears marks like clouds from his thoughtless error. His left arm bearing a tattoo he got in the Navy back in the eighties while in port in the Philippines of an anchor with a snake around it when he was too drunk to pick the one he really wanted.

His chest once tight from working out now sags slightly and abs lacking definition he once so proudly had now without a crease to be seen when he glances with regret each morning. His face with few day’s growth upon it having no need to be kept since Andrea left him last year. Hair kept slightly long to cover the scar where she threw his bear bottle at him which he frequently touches so as to remind him of when his life fell apart.

The wind as it continues to ride the spring wind dries his tears from leaving his eyes. Marlboro reds his brand of choice rolled up in his sleeve. The ash barely finds his attention. Rocking ever so slowly with small pauses he reflects on Andreas words hauntingly. “You no good piece of shit. Why the hell didn’t you die before you were born? Then I wouldn’t have to had put up with your shit these past five years” he plays over and over in his mind.

His breathe only existing for his smoke and sighs which he finds so hard to even try. Chase rose from his chair grabbing his lighter from the table next to him moves with zombie like motions, shoulders rounded from the weight of his life. Grabbing the door handle which is loose from lack of attention brings only a sigh from Chase.

He slams the door behind him and pauses for a moan “What a fucking loser I am” he whispers with pouting tone. The floor covered in beer cans and wrappers from junk food his only source of substance since Andrea left. Grabbing a burger from the table half eaten from the night before not caring of its condition or coldness he devours a few bites and then throws it on the floor.

He then picks up his 22 caliper revolver from the couch and sits down holding it in his hands and running his fingers along the barrel wishing instead it was Andrea’s skin. He flips open to make sure that the bullet is in the right chamber and flicks it shut. “I can’t go on like this” Chase shouts while looking up at his ceiling hoping for angelic intervention but finding only his own echo. Turning the barrel toward his face and finger shaking on the trigger he says, “This one’s for you Andrea. I can’t not be born but I can die for you. Is that what you want?” Squinting his eyes with the barrel in his mouth, shaking his finger gathering courage to squeeze down.

Chase loses his grip on the gun and falls against the side of his couch. A bright light flashes in the room. Could this be his angel almost too late? Chase holding a pillow to his face is oblivious to the light filling the room. A glowing orb makes its way downward glowing toward his moaning frame and swiftly departs back through his ceiling.

Going ever upward the orb finds the sky grey and puffy with weighted moisture waiting for release. As the orb makes its way through the cloud puncturing the withheld moisture as the rains strong in flow find their way to the dusty ground matching the tears in chases pillow. As the orb reaches the top of clouds it finds an awaiting portal worm hole in shape which removes it from presence.

Chase tired from ongoing tears falls asleep as the gun slides off the couch to the floor as he positions himself on his back. As if minutes the sun finds its way magically in the sky and sudden clearing of the storm in seconds reveals a slender woman dressed in a long flowing dress. Ripped at the hem from her hurried pace as she starts to run toward Chases’ ranch. She stumbles upon her dress and falls to the ground hitting her head on a rock. Blood flowing from the gash in her cheek she passes out.

Chase now finds the light in his eyes squints and sits up saying “damn, why the fuck can’t I end it all. I’m such s pussy.” He grabs the gun in anger at his failed mission and places it on the table next to the couch. Rising up from the couch with his arms stretched out with a yawn, he reaches down to scratch is balls and sniffs his arm pit and wrinkles his nose as the smell too much for his senses he swiftly pulls away and thinks, who gives a fuck, not like I’m going to see anyone anyway.

He opens the front door to find the woman lying on the ground. He quickly rushes out and says, “Andrea?” But seeing her brown shoulder length hair he realizes it’s not her. Seeing the puddle of blood he quickly kneels beside her and takes her in her arms carefully placing his face close to hers feeling a faint breath, he thinks to himself, “thank God”.

He caring her body into his house kicking beer cans and trash out of the way finds the stair case and carries her up to his bedroom which he hasn’t slept in since Andrea left him a year ago. He lays her down gently and runs to the bathroom looking for his first aid kit and wash cloth. He returns kneeling down by the bed and gently wipes the blood from her cheek, applying hydrogen peroxide to the wound and places some Neosporin on a gauze pad and puts tape on it to ensure it would stay in place.

Finding a chair in the corner, he places it beside the bed and thinks to himself, “who are you? You’re so beautiful. How did you get here? What the heck happened to you and why are you in a gown?” As the sun made its way across the sky, Chase only left her side for a minute to take a piss, wash his hands and pits. And returned to her side not even thinking about his needs for food he watched as she started to move. She mumbled “Stop, don’t touch me.” Turning into a screamed again “Stop!” as her eyes came open and she sat up. Frantically looking around to see where she was.

She felt the bandage on her cheek and said, “Who are you?” Chase said, “I’m Chase. I found you in my yard this morning. You were bleeding and I brought you in my house to make sure you were ok. What the heck happened to you?” Her hurried breathes started to relax seeing his friendly face.” I’m, Donna, Donna Johnson. Oh thank God, for a minute I thought you were that guy who ran my car off the road.” “Where was this?” he asked. She said, “I was on my way to a fundraising ball for disabled vets when some guy ran me off the road and into a ditch on highway 12 near Saw Mill Creek.” “Saw Mill Creek?” Chase said. “That’s five miles from here.” You poor thing he thought to himself catching a smile on her face. “I started down the road to find any sign of life but all the houses were dark except yours.” “Mine?” he said. “My lights were off last night.” “No. I saw this glowing light in your window when I was a mile away. That’s why I started running to your house. Then, I fell and that’s all I can remember”. “Huh,” he replied. Thinking that’s weird.

Chase said, “You hungry?” Donna replied, “No, but thank you for asking. I’m just sore” Grabbing her cheek. “Do you want to see a doctor about your cheek? I can drive you to town to the hospital if you want” He said. Donna replied, “Can I see a mirror?” Chase said, “Sure, sit still, I’ll go get my girlfriends, I mean ex-girlfriends she left behind.” Quickly he rushed to the dresser and grabbed the hand mirror and returned to her bed side. She smiled and took the mirror out of his hand touching his hand gently saying “Thanks, Chase was it?” Chase, slightly flustered at his appearance said, “Yeah, Chase.” She looked into the mirror, gently pulling the tape from the gauze and said, “That’s not too bad, I’ll be ok.” Removing the full bandage she said. “You’re my hero.” Chase said, “Nah, I couldn’t just leave you on the ground now could I” in a flirting tone showing a smile for the first time in a year.

Chase said, “Why don’t you get some rest for a while and I go check on your car and see if I can get it towed for ya.” Donna smiled and said, “You know even though I was passed out, I could use some rest. Thanks my angel.” Chase flustered and pleased by her comment, said “Rest Donna, I’ll take care of everything.

Chase rushing out the door grabbing his car keys and cell phone off the table by the door ran off to go check out her car. Donna, thinking of how cute Chase looked, tried to sleep, but was so curious about her rescuer. She rose from the bed and began looking around the bedroom seeing a picture of him with a blonde haired woman. Thinking to herself, “huh, guess she is the ex.” She noticed how the female items on the vanity were still in place like she still lived there. Donna slowly made her way down the stairs seeing trash and beer cans on the ground. She found her way to the kitchen. And found the broom, trash bags and began to clean up the mess. She said to herself, “It is the least I can do for my Chase”. She giggled, “My Chase, that sounds nice.” Donna had known such heart ache in her life as her husband Brad had been killed in the Gulf War one month after their marriage. That’s why she focused on helping disabled vets with her spare time to fill the void of her lack of her husband. Filling 10 trash bags and placing them out by the trash cans on the side of the house, Donna finally found the living room next.

She bent down and started picking up pieces of food, wrappers and cans not even caring about his mess. She started humming. She looked up on the table and saw a picture of Chase in his Navy uniform. Her eyes tearing up thinking of her late husband Brad. She then noticed the ship he was on was the USS Intrepid, a sister ship to her late Brad. She looked lovingly in to Chase’s face in the picture grabbing it with her hand. She said, “Wow, he was just as handsome then.”

Wiping her eyes she spotted the gun on the floor. Picking it up she started to think, “What is this doing here?” she looked to see it was loaded with a single bullet and started to think, “Oh my God, he couldn’t have been so hurting to do that.” And placed the gun behind the table so he wouldn’t be tempted to think about that again.

She now with even more fervor started cleaning up the mess that was Chase’s life. She went back and got the 409 and paper towels and began cleaning every inch of this downstairs home. Humming out loud she began to think of Chase’s face in that picture and when she woke up in his bed. “Donna girl, get a grip, he probably wouldn’t want you.” Now scrubbing with more force to repay her debt to him. “Well at least I can leave him with a clean home.

After finishing, she wondered where he was as the light of day was reaching dusk. She kept looking out the window and saw a pickup truck with its lights on coming down the dirt drive. She ran upstairs and giggled to herself. “Donna, he is going to think your some Looney tune. Chance entering his house dropped his cell seeing the state of his home.

Flowers in his hand that he had picked up to make her feel better and a bag of groceries to make dinner for her placed on the table. “Donna? He shouted, you still here? Donna, biting her lip, said “Yeah, I’m upstairs.” Chase, half embarrassed by her cleaning up his mess and half glad she was still there ran up half way up the stairs and thought, “Damn, do I give her the flowers or not? I don’t want her to think I’m some freak, especially after she cleaned my shit hole.” He then thought of her face and ran the rest of the way up the stairs hiding the dozen peach roses behind his back.

“Donna? Um thanks for cleaning up my house, I feel so bad, I’m such a slob.” Chase said humbly. Donna said, “Chase, please it was the least I could do after you helped me.” Chase said, “Still, thank you. She moved her legs inviting him to sit on the bed beside her. “Please sit down Chase.” He holding the roses behind his back, sat down, and said “Um, I got you something to make you feel better” he said as he revealed the dozen roses from behind his back. Donna trying hard not to cry, found tears streaming down her face. “Chase, they are beautiful she cried.” He said, “Hey no tears, I’m sorry I was hoping they would make you feel better.” Donna said “They did. They are beautiful.” She then explained about her dead husband Brad and how he was killed in the Persian Gulf as part of a landing party during the war. Chase touched her hand and said, “I’m so sorry.” What was his name?” Donna replied, Brad, Brad Johnson.” Chase’s face turned white as a ghost. He asked, “What was his rank?” Donna said, “He was a Lieutenant assigned to the Navy seals. Why?” Chase, not knowing how to collect his thoughts, started to cry. “Chase, why are you crying?”

“Donna. I was part of the team assigned to the support unit for Brad. I saw him the night before he died.” Donna now tingling all over with emotions, said, “What? I’m sorry, what?” Not believing her ears of what he had just said. Chase, said, “I remember that night like it was yesterday. We joined his ship for a meal together right after he had his primary mission briefing. Brad and I knew each other from training back in Virginia. He told me about how he just got married before deploying to a wonderful woman named….. d….da… Donna. Oh my God. How could it be you?” Donna said, “Yes, that is me.” Chase replied, “But, Donna lived in Virginia?” Donna said after Brad died I moved back home to be close to my parents. Chase said, “Oh, my. Donna, your husband was a great guy. He told me all about your hopes to have a child after he returned from the gulf. He showed a wedding picture he kept in a waterproof case around his neck. He went on for hours about you. He cried that night as we talked and said he had a bad feeling about the mission. He told me that he wanted to be with you and wasn’t going to re-up after his tour of duty was over so he could spend the rest of his life in your arms.” Donna, crying as Chase continued talking.

She said, “Go on, I need to hear this. You knew Brad the last night he was alive, I want to hear this.” Chase said, “Ok. I… I was listening to him go on about you and it sounded like a fairy tale that I wish I had in my life. He told me that he didn’t think he was going to make it and wrote a letter. He gave it to me in case he didn’t make it. I was over there for 5 months more and when we came back to Virginia, I couldn’t find you.” Donna said, “Yeah, I left the base after we buried Brad at Arlington. I needed to be near Mom and Dad for support. They both died a few years later. But I stayed here and worked at the VA Hospital in the administration department. You said something about a letter?” Chase said, “Yes, I still have it. Oh my God. I do. I didn’t know where to send it so I held on to it.” Chase, quickly rising to his feet ran over to his dresser and pulled open the top drawer. Grabbing on to the envelope, he rushed back to the bed side. “Here it is, Donna. I’m so sorry the base didn’t know where you moved to and I looked all over the Internet for your name, but couldn’t find you.”

Donna, shaking slowly grabbed the letter and said, “I can’t read it. Can you please read it to me?” Chase said, “I’d be honored to Donna.” He carefully took the envelope out of Donna’s hand. Donna said, “Thanks Chase.” Brad carefully treating the letter with the respect he had for years, opened the envelope and unfolded the letter. He began to read, “My dearest Donna, I am so lucky that I found you that summer day in Pittsburgh at college. Your smile and the way the sun glistened in your hair. The beautiful way you walked across the quad that day, I fell for you right then. My heart was in my throat and I could barely say a word as I walked up to you. The way you smiled and tilted your head, melting my apprehension and I was able to talk with you. You won me over from first sight and I am ever grateful that you are my wife. I am about to go on a mission that I can’t talk about, but if your reading this, I didn’t return. The guy I gave it to is Chase. He is a good friend to me and I want you to lean on him should I not return.”

Chase stopped reading the letter allowed and read the rest to himself. Donna said, “Chase, please read the rest to me.” Chase said, “I can’t, you need to read this yourself.” He handed her the letter and swiftly found where Chase had stopped. She read the rest to herself. “My dearest Donna. I know you will miss me if I should not live past tomorrow. I want you to find a guy to love you like I do. Someone like Chase. He is a great guy and a good friend to me. I know this sound silly, but if he is still alone like he is now, I want you to be a friend to him. He helped me realize just how great a friend can be. You can count on him to talk you through me not being there. Find a new guy to give you the love that I wouldn’t be able to give you my love. Someone great like Chase. I will be up in heaven watching you and know that I want you to find love in your life again. I hope you will never need to read this, but if you do, never doubt, that my last thoughts on earth will be of your tender embrace and love you filled me with to over flowing. Yours forever, Brad”

Donna, flowing with tears grabbed Chase and cried in his arms for an hour. Chase held on saying, “I’m so sorry, Donna I wish I could have found you when I got back.” Donna said, “Chase, you couldn’t have known where I was. I wanted to get away from anything that would remind me of the sea, but the VA Hospital was my way of remembering Brad. I can’t believe that of all the houses on the night I needed help most. I found you. That light in your house was so bright only your home pointed me where to go. How odd.” Chase said, “Honestly, Donna, I was going to kill myself last night.” Donna quickly interrupted him. “Chase, I know about the gun, I found it when I was cleaning. But you must have had a light on in your house. I saw such a bright light that lead me only here.” Chase said, “I had no light on, I passed out after I couldn’t pull the trigger.”

Donna said, “Huh, how did I find you then?” Chase said, “I don’t know. But I’m so glad you did. You needed that letter.” Both of them suddenly fell asleep in each other’s arms as if by a spell. Donna waking up with the letter still clinched in her hand, read the line again about Chase. A warm feeling filled her heart as if Brad himself had led her to Chase. When morning light filled the room, Donna still liking the feel of another man’s embrace almost with Brads approval made her fell so loved.

Chase waking up quickly removed his arms from Donna wanting not to seem like he was trying to take advantage of her. She quickly said, “Don’t go. You are the first man I held since Brad died and his letter told me I can trust you.” Chase lay there allowing the feelings of a woman’s touch to be validated without guilt. Donna, feeling the scar on the back of Chase’s neck said, ‘How did you get this scar? Was it in the war? Chase said, “Oh it was a war alright, but not with guns. My ex, Andrea through a beer bottle at me when I asked her to stop being so mean when she drank. She made me feel so bad and I loved her with all my heart. After she cut my neck with the bottle, I went to the hospital and after I got out, she was gone. She didn’t take any of her things except a suite case with some of her things. She left me a note. I still have it. Do you want to read it? I mean I read Brad’s letter, I think it is the least I can do.” Donna, touched by his tenderness said, “Chase, I would be honored to read it.”

Chase letting go of his loving embrace of Donna found the drawer by the bed. He said, You know, “This was the first night I slept in this bed since she left. Funny huh?” Donna smiling at his tenderness replied, “No Chase, I think it is sweet that we shared comfort last night. I haven’t slept that good since the last night Brad and I were together.”

Chase then pulled the drawer open and got the letter out. He handed it to her and said, “You know, Donna, this might sound weird, but, I feel so close to you.” Donna replied as she took the letter from his hand. “Chase, I feel the same way, it is like fate brought us together.” She then began reading the short letter from Andrea. “Chase, I know I am a horrible person when I drink. I can’t be with you anymore. It’s not you, it’s me. I just can’t get past that story you kept telling me over and over again about the Lieutenant and how you wanted the kind of love he had. I can’t be that Chase. I can never be like this woman that guy was married to. I’m me and I hate you for trying to make us have that perfect kind of love. Drop dead Brad. Maybe in hell you will be able to forget about some imaginary fantasy woman you tried to think I could be. I’m leaving you and never looking back. Bye you piece of shit.”

Donna, with tears in her eyes said, “Chase, you wanted Andrea to be like me? You never knew me, I’m not perfect. I’m so sorry if I caused you pain with Andrea.” Chase replied, “Donna, you don’t know Andrea she was just a girl who I thought I could change and it ruined me. You know Brad and I were close more than just that one night. He told me all about your ups and down during your relationship. Brad loved you because you accepted him for him. I know Brad and that takes a special woman.” Donna filled with affection for Chase’s words, said, “Chase, how can I feel so strongly for you so quickly, but I do. I can’t help it. It is like Brad was pointing my broken heart in your direction.” Chase said, “Huh, glad I didn’t pull that trigger last night.” Donna said, “Chase, I am so glad you didn’t either.”

As days went on, Chase helped repair Donna’s car and each night she brought him dinner. One year to the day they met, Chase and Donna were to be married. On that morning on Chase’s ranch now green with grass and full of love, Chase and Donna were in the backyard with all their friends in seats as the minister said “Is there anyone who objects to this couple from being man and wife let them speak now or forever hold their piece” A bright light from the few clouds above seemed to cover warmth on the couple. As the minister said, “I now pronounce you man and wife”. The sky parted and an orb watching from above flowed out into the universe. Everyone said, “Did you see that?” No one had a clue, but Donna kissing Chase, and then whispered, “Must have been Brad.” Chase said, “At least he didn’t object to us being man and wife.” They both felt a tingle in their beings of such joy knowing that their fate had been designed from above.

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